What is it that brings the family together? What can we do to become a tighter unit? This week, in class we talked about the history of work. Back during the 1800s and even at the turn of the century it seemed that the importance of family and their unity was better than it is today. Back then, families typically were farmers. See the family were famers, not just the father. It was a whole family affair. Today we see Dad and even Mom now leaving to go to work. But at this time. Work was at home, home was work. It took to whole family to keep the home and farm running. Siblings weren't just related, they were best friends. They learned together, they played together and they worked together. The family did everything together. Mom worked more with the daughters, she taught them, passed on her talents to them. Dad did the same, he taught his sons how to manage the farm, how to tend to the cattle and fields. The family understood that it took all of them to unify the home and family. But how do we apply that to today? Well we can take similar tactics. We can work together more. Cook dinner together, eat dinner together. I listened to a mormon messages video. Robert D. Hales speaks about the importance of eating together as a family and how much his own mother stressed it's importance. We need to start doing the little things again. It may be a different age and a different time, but we can still be a unified family like it was before. If you are interested in this video here is the link, I would recommend it to anyone: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-cxHd773Ya0

This week we talked a lot about communication and the ways we can verbalize and discuss our issues. There are so many ways to read people and their emotions. People tell me that they can read me like an open book. My emotions might be written plainly on my face, but maybe my face and my voice don't really convey what I'm thinking and feeling. It's a huge possibility. Sometimes it's so easy for us to assume that people have a certain problem with us by the looks they give us, their body language, and their words. But how much of that should we take for face value? We should always be willing to discuss with and open heart and an open mind. I found it easier to talk to someone when I have prayed and really asked my Father in Heaven to guide me in my words and my actions; that I may be able to convey my feelings and thoughts without hurting the person I am speaking to. Humans are sensitive and we feast off of those around us and those whom we love; we We can't always judge a book by it's cover. Yes someone may sound mad, may look mad, but maybe in reality they are hurting inside. We need to take a step back and really jump back in with a better perspective; and eternal one. 

How has your family dealt with stress and coping with certain crisis situations? I have seen my family deal with it in several ways. This week we talked about the ways families can deal and cope with several different problems. First there's the actual event plus the resources used and the cognitions regarding the experience. This equals the total experience. Families can encounter many different problems and crises. When a family is dealing with a problem currently they can turn to many resources which can affect the outcome of the event. These resources can be relying on the spouse, friends, mom/dad and so on. Then there are the cognitions regarding the experience. This is when the family takes the crisis and decides what to do about it and how to feel about it. It's how the family is going to deal and cope with their crisis. Our outcomes and total experience can always change solely depending on our chosen resources and cognitions. If a crises is happening and we're worried it'll "destroy" the family, it won't! We have control over that. We have control over who our resources are and what we're going to take away from our trials. For example, if there's a tragic death in the family. The wife and husband have the option to turn to each other and rely upon one another. They can also rely upon the Spirit of the Lord and pray fervently about what they can learn from their situation and they can make the changes that are necessary to stay together and grow as one; rather than grow apart.  We may not have control over the actual event, but we have control over the outcomes and what we learn and how we grow. 

How do we give the right messages to our children about the sacredness of procreating?

To be honest I've always been terrified with the idea of getting married. I know an LDS girl afraid to get married. Weird. But that is me. Marriage is a huge commitment that has always daunted me. This week we spoke of the difficulties that newlyweds may encounter and the adjustments that we need to make. There are several things that will make the marriage work out successfully and most importantly lead to a happy marriage. When we get married we become one entity, of one purpose. People are afraid to marry because they are worried they will lose themselves, lose their "identity." But if getting married means becoming one, how would it that work if people remained the exact same. Eating habits, sleeping habits, hygiene habits, spending habits...if we didn't change at least one of these things the marriage would never work. We need to make adjustments in ourselves, our habits and in our lives for marriage. This doesn't mean we have to change everything about us, because typically factor in why people get married and chose their spouses was because of their compatibility. So obviously they are compatible for each other, but now they need to work on minor adjustments to help accommodate their spouse. Brother Williams said in class that he of all the really successful marriages that he has seen didn't just happen accidentally or didn't happen easily. Marriage isn't supposed to easy and I firmly believe that. Nothing easy is worth it. But our compromise and adjustments we make will